(but first, my cool new shirt...)
Pop Tarts are fucking gross. Hot or cold. They are however, filling.
My dog gets treated better than any human child ever will be by me.
It may be frowned upon to want to punch a 5 year old, but it's not as frowned upon to think about it.
If you are a fan of Chef Boyardee Beef Ravioli, you will not be a fan of actual beef ravioli.
People in Florida really have no idea what good Chinese food tastes like.
I'm uncomfortable living in the country responsible for American Cheese.
T-Shirts that don't have seams on the sides are a dog-send.
I am really good at drawing tacos on Draw Something.
Cookie dough in ice cream is amazing, actual cookies in ice cream is gross.
There will always be sandy paw prints in my bed.
I am so totally socially awkward that it's almost sickening.
If you someone asks you what you gave up for lent and you say "Religion," they will no longer want to talk to you.
If you have a party of 20 old people at a restaurant, you can almost bet they will all order the endless lunch special. Unless someone else is paying, then it's the most expensive item on the menu, and they won't even finish it.
A dirty shirt in the dryer for 10 minutes = a clean shirt.
My blog is probably going to hit 50,000 views by the weekend.
HOLY SHIT! My blog is going to hit friggin' 50,000 views by THIS WEEKEND!!!!
And one last one...
I have never spit out a pop tart faster than when I saw Sheldon Cooper (big bang theory) wearing a french maid costume on tonight's episode.
Ok, so that should do it for now...