Skank-o-Ween

I love Halloween... I even posted about how it's the greatest day of all time... but that doesn't mean there aren't things that I HATE about it. 

I hate that it isn't socially acceptable for me to go trick-or-treating at my age.

I hate that all female costumes are made for girls with gigantic boobs and tiny butts (the opposite of me).

I hate that Halloween is the one day of the year that guys know who the closet sluts are, and they head straight for them leaving everyone else in the dust to talk to the creepy guy in the batman mask who could very well be 50 years old and nobody would know.

In fact, out of everything that I don't like about the holiday, the slut factor has to be the worst. I want to be scared. I want to see blood and guts and axe murderers and monsters and shit but no... bumble bee's, cats, lady bugs, and strawberry shortcakes are going to litter the bars and the parties. There will be no place for the zombies or the CIA agents... unless those costumes include a bikini top and/or a mini skirt.

I've been searching far and wide for costume ideas that aren't overly slutty, or just plain generic but I've been coming up empty handed. It makes me almost want to just give in and squeeze my hips into a shiny lycra body suit with wings sewn on the back. (Hey, I would rock the shit out of it, but i would not be able to pull a scary prank on ANYONE.)

I feel like I can safely call out the trends for this year... an obvious shoe-in would be Vampires (again *sigh*). Not that I'm complaining... real vampires, that don't sparkle, are hot as shit... True Blood costumes are going to be in abundance like whoa. Also... zombies. Zombies galore. The Walking Dead is only one of the recent zombie filled trends to hit our generation, but that wicked make-up is going to be a tough one to top. I for see a slew of Nicki Minajs' and some more Lady Gaga's as usual... maybe some Snooki's and some Situations. Maybe some chicks will walk around with a permanent Jenna Marble's "face" or those girls who are too cool for school will walk around in their permanent 'white girls at the club' outfits. 

Norman Reedus killin some zombies *drools*

I still don't know what I want, or am going to be. I don't even know what I'm going to do. Usually I don't decide until last minute, hopefully something worth while pops up. It better involve candy.